I have asked myself this question a million times....Why do most BLACK ATHLETES chose to marry or date WHITE women?
Is it because they feel it's what society expects of them? Is it because WHITE women are more beautiful than BLACK women? Is it the submissive nature of most WHITE women ?
WHAT IN THE HELL IS IT?
I'm not sure....and it's a conversation that I've had with my girlfriends and guy friends and we all have our personal opinion. It's just so hard to understand the rational behind the answer when our strong black athletic men are raised by STRONG BLACK women, in BLACK communities, attending BLACK churches and BLACK schools.
How is it possible that you would go out and find a mate that looks nothing like, talks nothing like, acts nothing like what you've been so familiar with for most of your life? Or, is that the reasoning? Are black athletes trying to escape the past? Are they trying to create new memories with what society has said is pure and right?
We all see how our athletes are sought after and prodded at like cattle in a herd.....waiting for their number to be called during the draft. Or, waiting for the once in a lifetime contract. Early on....they are sent to WHITE universities, where there are WHITE women, with WHITE coaches and new WHITE mentors who try to groom them for the professional athletic life. And as long as the going is good......they're accepted and welcomed into the WHITE families without hesitation.
BUT you better believe that if that same 6'9" black male was an ex-con...BECKY and REBECCA's DAD wouldn't have 2 words to say to him. As a matter of fact, he would give her an ultimatum....GET RID OF HIM or YOU'RE OUT OF THE WILL!
Recently a well known news program aired a special on women who seek out athletes. The report focused on athletes and the women they date and marry. They showed various white women who take their college fund to travel to places that are frequented by athletes with the sole intention of becoming a BASKETBALL, BASEBALL or FOOTBALL wife.
Personally, I don't see anything wrong for going for what you know....However, I have a problem with black men who solely date WHITE women.....and those who don't recognize or acknowledge the fact that this woman WOULD NOT have anything to do with him IF he didn't have a multi-million dollar contract.
So, I ask, "Is it the circumstances of the athletes that cause them to make certain decisions when choosing a mate?" "Or, are these the only available women that they're exposed to during their professional career?"
It can't possibly be!
I honestly couldn't and can't figure it out. It's something that continues to circle my thought process. It really baffles me as I look and listen to my black athletes praise their black mothers and grandmothers who have done such an amazing job to get them to where they are now....But then they go and marry Becky, Sarah and Elizabeth.....forgetting about poor Nicole, Tonya and Monique who helped them through high school or even kicked it with them when they first made it to college.
Please know that it's duly noted and understood that at some point these black athletes begin to socialize with diverse groups and the circle in which they travel change. However, there are black women in every part of this world....in every shade and color.....in every size and shape. So, I refuse to believe that Kobe Bryant, Terrell Owens, Reggie Bush, Michael Strahan, Tiger Woods, Richard Jefferson, Bradon Jacobs, Lamar Odom, or David Garrad, couldn't possibly find a black woman that could and would support them through their professional career.
The social phenomena of black athletes and white women has reached epidemic proportions. Whether or not it's true that the majority of black athletes are married to white women.....who really knows. BUT it is what mainstream America has chosen to present to us. Black athletes who marry and only date white women has been a hot topic amongst black women for years and it will continue to be.
I believe that everyone deserves to find happiness with a mate despite the color of their skin. HOWEVER, I also believe that where there's smoke......there's a fire.
So, again I ask......WHY do BLACK ATHLETES chose to marry and date WHITE WOMEN rather than BLACK WOMEN? Better yet.....why do SUCCESSFUL BLACK MEN chose to MARRY AND DATE WHITE WOMEN as oppose to BLACK WOMEN? I don't know......maybe I'll call Reggie, Koby or Tiger and ask them.
Remember this is more than just a blog. It's informative and entertaining!
IT'S VERY SIMPLE BLACK WOMEN ARE NOT RAISED TO BE WIVES. WE DON’T TAKE TIME TO SHOW OUR CHILDREN HOW TO CHOOSE A MATE. WHEN WILL WE STOP AND MAKE THE CHANGE? TODAY IT IS FASHIONABLE TO HAVE A BABY OUT OF WEDLOCK. OUR YOUNG BLACK GIRLSA ARE TOLD CONSTANTLY YOU DON’T NEED A MAN. YOU’RE BEAUTIFUL AND SMART. OH YEAH! IF THE MONEY GET TIGHT YOU CAN ALWAYS “SEX WITH A PURPOSE”. WHAT YOU ARE REALLY TELLING THEM CUT A DEAL WITH THE DEVIL, YOU CAN BEAT HIM BECAUSE GOD WILL FORGIVE YOU BEFORE YOU DIE. OUR BLACK WOMN ARE SO BUSY TRYING TO GET ALL THEY CAN OUT OF MEN. THEY NEVER TAKE TIME TO EXPAIN TO THEIR DAUGHTERS THAT GOD HAS GIVEN US ALL A PURPOSE/RESPONSIBILITY IN LIFE. WE ARE TO BE HELPMATES, A MENTAL, PHYSICAL, AND SPIRITUAL SUPPORT TO ONE ANOTHER.
ReplyDeleteALL YOUR ANSWERS ARE IN YOUR BLOG "SEXING WITH A PURPOSE”. IF YOU ARE GOING TO BE THE WHORE BE THE WHORE. THEY GROW UP AND PLAY THE SAME GAME YOU PLAYED. I KNOW THEY DON’T SEE WHAT YOU DO. YOU DON’T BRING THESE MEN AROUND. REMEMBER YOUR SONS AND DAUGHTERS ARE NOT STUPID. SO AS YOU SEX FOR A PURPOSE AND YOUR DAUGHTER WILL DO THE SAME THING 9 TIMES OUT OF 10. YOUR SON HAS WATCHED YOU ROTATE THE MEN, USING THEM AND MAKING THE COMMENTS ABOUT NOT NEEDING A MAN, BUT YOU ARE ALWAYS LOOKING FOR HELP. THEY GROW UP AND NEVER TRUST WOMEN. HE OBTAINS A CAREER WHICH ALLOW HIM TO ENTER “THE ELITE” SOCIAL CIRCLE WHICH INCLUDE WHITE WOMEN WHO HAVE BEEN TRAINED TO CATOR TO HER MAN AND FAMILY. HE IS BLINDSIDED AND SHE STILLS HIS HEART. HE NEVER PLANNED ON HAVING A WHITE WIFE, IT JUST HAPPENEND.
SO I SAY CONTINUE TO SELL YOUR SOLE FOR SHORT TERM PLEASURES AND YOU WILL NOT ONLY CONTINUE TO DESTROY YOUR FAMILY’S NEXT GENERATION, BUT YOU WILL CONTINUE TO DESTORY THE BLACK RACE AND FAMILIES OF THE FUTURE. YOU MUST TAKE RESPONSIBILITY.
I don't think that there is a single answer. All the athletes that you have mentioned have different situations. Tiger Woods, Kobe Bryant grew up in a mostly white world, so it could be expected that they would marry someone white. Terrell Owens, David Gerrard grew up in a mostly black world. Terrell even has black women as his best friends.
ReplyDeleteMy thought is that money gives you access to more events with a broader scope of people. My experience is that black women don't necessarily want to be with or do things that a broader scope of people want to do. Black women feel more comfortable being around black people. Well, if you have money, you want to be where the party is at, not just around black people. You might want to go to boating, black women don't want to do that. You might want to go to the hot new club where other superstars are going to be, black women sometimes don't want to do that. Long story short, women (especially black women) are tough to please. It's much more work than dealing with Becky, Sarah or Elizabeth who probably won't question a man's every move.